Release

Link: Core Values
Focus: Holy Scripture (4/7)
Day: 04/95
Pathway summary: Study of the Word of God with expectation of Holy Spirit inspired revelation.
Justification: (Deuteronomy 6:6-9; Psalm 119; John 16:7-15; 2 Timothy 3:16-17)
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Setup:
Continuing the Bible study on Love.  I took a break that lasted a day longer than intended - and it took intention and effort to restart.  A reminder that change is possible but requires effort.
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Prep:
Today's love-theme is release.  Or re-lease.  As the implementation strikes.

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Execution:
I started off with prayer; I recognized I was not where I needed to be and felt like I hadn't grown. God reminded me that He is the one who does the changing and it was presumptive of me to presume that just asking for change would immediately cause it. Also - that I have changed, because I'm aware of the need AND then it was a reminder that Love is not always about doing the right thing - it's about not doing the wrong things.  Verse focus was 1 Corinthians 13:11.

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Day 4 Conclusions / Thoughts

So the best sorts of changes - the ones that are well-balanced, have a lasting impact, and cause the least amount of long-term damage - are my least favorite kind. The iterative ones - where you have to make the same decision repeatedly. Where you have to do it again. And again.  It's like a twisted lifetime-long "Who wants to be a millionaire" with oddly-appropriate people asking "are you sure".

This is easy when it is positive reinforcement. Yes, I like chocolate. Yes, I love my spouse. Yes, I do fit into the bracelet I wore twenty years ago.

It is hard to do with repentance. To repent, not just the first time, but every time. And to do so mindfully, willingly, gladly, and to give thanks while doing it.

And I've been learning that God really wants me to change - but, much like prayer is more for us than for Him (because He already knows what we're going to ask for AND knows what we need, so why ask?), repentance is our opportunity to be humbled, to rely upon Him, and to be aware of what we're repenting.  If repentance were easy - everybody would do it and it likely wouldn't have the same import.

But repentance, to turn away, to choose the less-comfortable path, is what we are called to do. We are to "put away childish things". What's a childish thing? Something that encourages you to act immature, to be selfish, to draw you away from God. Anything can be a childish thing.

And in that release, that repentance, that acceptance that we need God, we can be more Loving - in fact, we kind of get out of our own way.